Sunday, April 13, 2008

Senior Sunday


Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
No one expects you to run into a burning building.
People call at 9 p.m. and ask, "Did I wake you?"
People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
There's nothing left to learn the hard way.
Things you buy now won't wear out.
You can eat dinner at 4:00 p.m.
You enjoy hearing about other people's operations.
You get into a heated argument about pension claims.
You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.
You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
You sing along with the elevator music.
Your eyes won't get much worse.
Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the National Weather Service.
Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
Your supply of brain cells is finally down to a manageable size.
You can't remember who sent you this list.
The world was made round so that we would never be able to see too far down the road.

Over the river and through the woods to Grandmother's house they went for Grandma's birthday. When they arrived little Johnny said to Grandma, "Happy Birthday" and then proceeded to ask her how old she was.
Grandma immediately answered, "I'm 39 and holding."
To that, little Johnny asked, "Okay so hold old would you be if you let go?"


Mike said...

Getting old is just part of life. As I'm now one of the "older" generation I can say that ailments are more apt to give me trouble than when I was younger lol. The cartoon made me chuckle too :)

Mercedes said...

ROFL! I got that sunbathing pic in an email yesterday! Too funny!

I have been looking for the mandarin orange cake post-do you still have it? I am wanting to put it in the Scrumptious Sunday archives and I had spotlighted it for that week then decided to do the archives. Now I can't find it-hehe!

Sandee (Comedy +) said...

Ain't it the truth. Loved them all. The cartoon made me spew water all over my monitor. Thanks for the laughs. Have a great day Sandy. :)